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Writer's pictureTakumigo

Cho Chikun's "My Resume" (11): Married at 21

Original title:趙治勲 私の履歴書(11)21歳で結婚

Original article: The Nikkei

Author: Cho Chikun, Honorary Meijin


I met Kyoko Senzawa, who was six years older than me, during my time at the Kitani Dojo in Hiratsuka, Kanagawa Prefecture.


She initially came to Kitani Minoru-sensei to learn proper etiquette. She had assumed that a "Go master" would be similar to a master of tea ceremony or flower arrangement (go along with tea ceremony and flower arrangement were considered as Japan's national culture), but the reality was quite different. Moreover, as Kitani-sensei’s health worsened, she was unable to continue her etiquette lessons. Eventually, she returned to her hometown of Asahikawa, Hokkaido, after about a month. During that time, we communicated frequently and quickly grew closer.


Even after she returned to Asahikawa, we maintained a long-distance relationship for a while. Later, when her younger sister, who aspired to be an actress, moved to Tokyo, Kyoko also returned to Tokyo. We watched movies together, like Tora-san, and went on many dates. She often visited my apartment in Tokyo and cooked for me.


Unlike my pessimistic nature, she was cheerful and optimistic. Being with her made me feel very relaxed, so I decided without hesitation to marry her.


Although her parents supported our marriage, I didn’t inform my parents in Korea. At the time, the tradition in Korea was to marry through arranged meetings (Arranged marriages were very common in east Asian countries before mordenization: China, Korea and Japan, family interests played a big role in it), and if I had told them, they would have undoubtedly opposed it.


We held a small wedding ceremony in November 1977 at the Tsurugaoka Hachimangu Shrine in Kamakura, attended only by close friends and family. Since none of my family members could attend, I invited Asano Hideaki, a fellow uchi-deshi, to stand in as my family. Though it may sound a bit disrespectful, Asano seemed to have accidentally become a professional Go player. Since I, too, had once been on the verge of giving up, we bonded as two "failures." At the wedding, he was more excited than I was.


After we got married, I discovered that Kyoko was a vegetarian. She didn’t eat meat or fish at all. Although we had once eaten shabu-shabu on a date, I hadn’t noticed. She later told me, "I felt nauseous when biting into the meat, so I swallowed it quickly." However, despite not tasting it herself, she always cooked delicious meat and fish dishes, which I greatly admired.


We started our new life in Kamakura, Kanagawa Prefecture, where she loved living. We lived in a small rental house in the quaint town of Jomyoji, and I have fond memories of our interactions with the neighbors.


The residents of the nearby apartment were quite interesting, and we often drank together. It was during this time that I had my first experience of drinking too much and needing to call an ambulance. Since then, I've had to rely on an ambulance in similar situations about five times.


I once saw an advertisement for a watercolor painting class on a utility pole and thought it might help with my calligraphy, so I decided to take the class. However, it turned out to be an oil painting class, and a very traditional one at that. I had no interest in oil painting, so it was quite a struggle for me. Since I was the only student in the class, it was hard to quit, which troubled me a lot.


On the other hand, the Go class I started at my home was very successful. The second floor of our rental house wasn’t spacious enough, so we borrowed a large house from a wealthy couple who attended the class to accommodate more students.


After our eldest daughter was born, we felt the house was too small, and the same couple suggested we use one of their old houses. When we went to see it, we turned it down because it was too damp. But if we had endured it and moved in, we might have settled in Kamakura. Later, we moved to Chiba. Although I don’t dislike Chiba, I still feel some regret about leaving Kamakura.


I got married at 21. Although I married young, it allowed me to focus on Go. Whenever I felt nervous about a match, my gentle and understanding wife always comforted me.

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